Cheltenham Town P - P Darlington

Football League Two: Saturday 30th January 2010

We were walking to Whaddon Road when someone shouted "its off", "frost?" "didn't say". Its odd how your weekend can revolve around 90 minutes on a saturday afternoon. You are at a loss.

A bit of a surprise because a few games had already got underway in local parks. They were even playing on the wreck in Whaddon Road. Then again the thought of standing on our slab of concrete at windy corner with inadequate gloves and head-gear was not really that edifying.

Sitting in front of the TV like a Jonah wishing ill luck on all the bottom clubs looked like it was paying off until Grimsby got a penalty. It would end their desperate points drought. The bad vibes from all those other Cheltenham fans sat at home seems to have lifted the ball 10 feet over the bar. No damage done.

Another wet tuesday night at Whaddon Road awaits for the rescheduled game.

Cheltenham Town 1 - 4 Rochdale

Football League 2; Saturday 23rd January 2010

This was not a rout it was a well organised educational away day delivered by a highly competent Rochdale. You got the feeling that on the coach down the manager had asked for a three goal victory; unless Cheltenham misbehaved and were asking for a detention.

Rochdale let the class have the ball during most of the first half before they got the flip charts out and showed Cheltenham what they could have been doing. They must have been quite pleased with the home side who knocked the ball about a bit better than past school reports had indicated. Alsop did his job as a moderately competent target man. Townsend was a worthy captain and Richards worked hard but faltered whenever he entered the box. Cheltenham were indecisive and didn’t grab the chances they were offered.

Mesmerised by the day-glow Heaton, who over occupied the Rochdale goal, Hutton and Richards couldn’t help themselves from floating the ball into his fluorescent orange hands. More than a few scoring opportunities floundered because of Heaton’s magnetic effect. Most high balls landed firmly in his grasp and any other effort became ineffectual because of the perceptual confusion created by his kit. You got the impression he was twice his actual size.

After Cheltenham’s worthy efforts Rochdale thought it was time to start acquiring the three goal win they were instructed to secure. They switched-on in the last ten minutes of the first half. Lesson objective 1 was duly delivered; take throw-ins quickly and don’t allow the defense any time to get organized. O’Grady (one of the Co.Kerry O’Grady’s?) duly smacked in the first of a hat-trick.

Half time was not as depressing as some past breaks have been when Cheltenham looked certain to get a thrashing (even though the forcast had over predicted the temperature). In fact Rochdale could have been accused of being a bit casual. They made amends by getting quickly out of the trap and breezing in the second. You now knew the game was out of Cheltenham’s reach. Keeping it to two would be an achievement. The third duly came. It was easy and the Rochdale fans made us aware of it even though we do remember them when they were less perfumed.

Positive feedback: Cheltenham didn’t give up. Alsop, Hutton and Richards came off and on went Hammond, Bird and Hayles (who looked like boiling over but responded to the quite chat in the ref’s office). Townsend got a well deserved goal. Rochdale went up the other end and secured the agreed three goal advantage. Time for heads to drop? A couple of the young loan players looked that way but Cheltenham kept playing whilst Rochdale played around with them.

This was not so bad as to warrant leaving early with your hands in your pocket loudly talking about “a load of rubbish”. Most of the regulars around us did just that. It was pleasing to see that a few were willing to offer some appreciation. The important thing is to try and put the lesson to good effect against teams who are a match for us

Cheltenham Town: S Brown; D Pipe, A Gallinagh, M Townsend, D Andrew; J Labadie, J Low, M Thornhill, D Hutton (D Bird 57); J Richards (B Hayles 76), J Alsop (E Hammond 57). Subs not used: D Diallo. M Pook, W Puddy, T Lewis.

Rochdale: T Heaton; S Wiseman, N Stanton, C Dawson, T Kennedy; A Haworth (A Rundle 86), J Kennedy, J Taylor, J Thompson (K Higginbotham 58); O'Grady, Dagnall. Subs not used: K Arthur, G Jones, R McArdle, M Flynn.

Referee: G D Horwood. Attendance: 3,460.

Cheltenham Town P-P Burton Albion

League 2 Saturday 19th December 2009

This would have been my last match at Whaddon Road for 2009. Unfortunately commitments mean I will miss Boxing Day's match against Bournmouth. So much can happen between now and 9th January 2010 when we entertain Hereford.

It's the mid-point of the season and the process of selecting a new manager is underway. With luck this postponment has given everyone a breather. The board can do some serious thinking and the injured can get closer to fitness.

As to who will be in charge when I return to Whaddon Road next year I have no idea and little advice to offer (Mark Yates with John Finnigan as assistant?) Staying in this league may seem the ambition of a squashed frog but at the year's end it seems an entirely reasonable goal for May with the reaper so close behind.

Chesterfield 1 - 0 Cheltenham Town

League Two - Saturday 12th December 2009

On a long drive with my long suffering wife I turned the car radio on for Sports Report. The jolly anachronistic theme tune is from the days of the BBC Light Programme. We know it by heart - Da-Dum-Da-Dum-Da-Dumpety-Dum etc etc. It cheers you up on a chilly winter Saturday when the sun has disappeared so early it really shouldn't have bothered to get up in the first place.

By the time James Alexandra Gordon (or who ever owns that football heritage voice) got to "Football League Two" we were crossing the Hampshire Downs. I was beginning to get in the mood for a mild celebration. A draw would do..... "Chesterfield Town one.........." there was a tantalising pause "Cheltenham Town ........ Nil". And it was gone - sod, sod, sod ......

We are in the bleak mid-winter. The statistics tell it all. Grimsby are crawling their way out of the grave and Lincoln or Cheltenham are ready to roll in with the dead men.

The reports of this match are depressing. Lifeless and unimaginative by all accounts. Lewis had the best and only chance of a goal (for his sake let's hope the scouts were impressed) and that was it. Chesterfield felt they should have scored more and the 115 travelling supporters got no thanks for a thankless journey as the team headed for the tunnel.

What a way to celebrate Martin Allen's departure. The news broke on Friday - "By mutual agreement.... etc etc." Why bother to speculate how it ended. I would imagine he won't need to look for work just yet. The club is back to square one - minus a lot of money and league places (& possibly a few players by the end of January). It would have been preferable to have let Keith Downing take us down and certainly cheaper. A softer landing maybe.

In any organisation the people who manage well are hardly noticeable. They just seem to be there - part of things - and things just seem to roll along with purpose. The new happens and is accepted. It invariably makes sense. They don't demand attention. They give credit to others and don't shout the odds. They aren't threatened by the legacy of their predecessors and keep what's good.

The cult of the 'change-agent' is generated by 4th rate MBA courses. Managers don't think they are managing unless they've turned the world up-side down. The problem is they don't really know what it is they want in its place; other than monuments to themselves – even if it’s just a new office. They'll recognise what they want when they see it but until then they couldn't really tell you what it looks like. They have a vague idea about esprit de corps and make token remarks about people being their greatest assets. But it's empty and ... well it’s too late by then. They've wrecked the joint.

Cheltenham Town are struggling. It’s very bleak. What will it be like by the end of April? I have no idea.


Cheltenham Town: S Brown; D Pipe, A Eastham, A Gallinagh, J Low; B Marshall (K Haynes 53), D Bird (E Hammond 80), J Labadie, B Hayles; J Alsop (J Richards 52), T Lewis. Subs: B Richardson, D Diallo, M Watkins, M Pook.

Referee: O Langford.

Attendance: 3, 145 (115 from Cheltenham).

Cheltenham Town 2 - 2 Northampton Town

Saturday 5th December, Football League 2


Cheltenham Town made a spirited contribution to the season of good will with some excellent slap-stick defending. Having gone in at half-time with two scrappy goals from Barry Hayles under their belts they quickly let Akinfenwa get his second. A long kick from the slightly dodgy Dunn was helped in past the advancing Brown and a variety of pantomime characters who were ineffectually throwing themselves around like policemen from Aladdin.

Akinfenwa was an excellent dame - buxom and wiley - who only exerted himself when in his interests. He must have made a calculation about how much of an unhealthy lifestyle he can enjoy whilst still keeping a couple of League Two centre backs busy and earning a crust. So far so good and given half a chance he would have done for Cheltenham this afternoon. He looked like a man who could steal a hat-trick.

At least Cheltenham had some idea of the script - everything directed at Alsop who held it up or nodded it on - for Richards or Hayles to make use of. Hayles got in the right place a few more times than he had been doing recently and Richards persisted. But neither goal keeper had much to do and as the afternoon wore on a draw seemed more acceptable.

Pipe & Eastham were having their debutes and did ok whilst Marshall gave a couple of glimpses of his class. Theo Lewis was a bit of a shrinking violet (perhaps he is saving himself for greater things?) Low can be useful but shirks at 50=50 situations which too frequently renders them 40-60. Gallinagh is a worker as is Bird but the team is lacking in inspiration; except for Alsop who makes a good Buttons.

CHELTENHAM TOWN: S Brown; D Pipe, A Gallinagh, A Eastham, J Low; B Marshall, D Bird, T Lewis, B Hayles (M Watkins 89); J Alsop, J Richards. Subs not used: D Diallo, M Pook, D Hutton, E Hammond, K Haynes, B Richardson.

NORTHAMPTON TOWN: C Dunn; J Johnson, C Hinton, D Swailes (D Beckwith 63), P Gilbert; B McKay (P Rodgers 46), R Gilligan, J Curtis, A Holt; A Akinfenwa, C Herbert (S Guinan 88). Subs not used: A Dyer, M Jacobs, S Brown, P Kanyuka.

REFEREE: K G Evans.

ATTENDANCE: 2,824 (244 from Northampton).

Torquay United 3 - 0 Cheltenham Town

Torquay United 3 - 0 Cheltenham Town
League 2 Tuesday 1st December

Torquay scored their accustomed three goals against the same Cheltenham side which beat Barnet 5-1. Barnet held second top team Bournemouth to a home draw (1-1). If you tried to find a pattern in all this you would go mad.

There is no pattern - other than Torquay always scoring three against Cheltenham and evidently looked a class act in doing so. Mind you they are not so much of a class act as to be other than on the same points as Cheltenham (19) and one place above on superior goal difference (six of them donated by yours truly).

Obviously not a nice evenings entertainment for the 104 who travelled to the sea-side and stood in the rain. But who knows what random events will occur this Saturday.

Cheltenham are next at home to Northhampton who lost 1-3 at home to Hereford. Will they come to Whaddon Road and impress as a skillful and solid unit and whip us 3-0? Could it turn into a dull 0-0 draw or a resounding Cheltenham victory. Who knows? There is no logic or pattern when you support a poor team like this. Its a merry-go-round.

TORQUAY UNITED: M Poke; L Mansell, C Robertson, M Ellis, A Smith (K Nicholson 90); J Thomson (D Stevens 83), N Wroe, C Hargreaves, W Carlisle; S Rendell, C Zebroski (E Benyon 90). Subs not used: S Bevan, T Sills, T Thompson, E Palmer.

CHELTENHAM TOWN: S Brown; K Haynes (D Pipe 52), A Gallinagh, D Diallo, J Low; B Marshall, D Bird, J Labadie, T Lewis (J Alsop 52); B Hayles, J Richards (E Hammond 67). Subs not used: M Pook, M Watkins, A Eastham, J Perry.

REFEREE: C Sarginson.

ATTENDANCE: 2,122 (104 from Cheltenham).

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Cheltenham Town 5 - 1 Barnet

Cheltenham Town 5 - 1 Barnet
League 2, Tuesday 24th November.

In the first 20 minutes this one looked like it was going the way of all things as Barnet got off to a lively start. They were direct and nippy, and wind assisted. In fact the assistance probably amounted to 40 mph at times. John O’Flynn's flying header looked like it could be the first of a few more. It came off of a fabulous Albert Jarrett cross from the left wing and zipped past Brown. We applauded "Oh bloody hell, here we go again" said my pessimistic inner self. He turned out to be just a little bit mistaken.

Barnet didn't capitalize on the advantage and Cheltenham didn't turn in on themselves in response to the early goal. Quite the contrary, they looked like they were on for a scrap and set about making amends. They also had Ben Marshall, on loan from Stoke and having his first taste of Whaddon Road. I hope he doesn't think its always like this; a half empty wind tunnel with plenty of room to walk up and down. Which was what a man was doing with a baby in a pram behind the goal at the Carlsberg end.

The first Cheltenhan goal was another smart header. Gallinagh sent it home from a Bird free kick after Marshall was bulldozed to the ground by an ugly challenge. You wouldn't have blamed him for going a bit quiet after that but he didn't. He played like he loved the club (which would be nice). In fact the whole team looked as if they were damned if they were going to get rolled over again. There was Scoffield in his nice suit for the first time. Maybe they didn't want to spoil it for him. Marshall headed in the second from close range before half time and despite their urgency Barnet were unable to level it.

The second half gave Cheltenham the assistance of the low altitude jet-stream. Give Brown credit, he'd worked out not to kick the ball too high into the wind because it stalled over the half way line and began floating back. The Barnett keeper took some time to work that one out. The game opened up a bit and Cheltenham looked like they should have been squeezing Barnett and limiting their space. But unusually at Whaddon Road this season (and to be honest last season as well) the visitors didn't get the breaks.

Cheltenham kept their concentration and stuck to the task of defending a lead. Low gets more popular as a result and Diallo may be coming out of a sticky patch. Haynes was not slipped by his man as often as he might have been and Gallinagh was back where he belonged. Bird got back and seemed interested again. Barry Hayles did some good things and then got a tad reckless.

The scene was now set for an unlikely evenings entertainment. Barnet did not collapse and didn't stop trying but as Cheltenham know, when its not going your way there's little you can do about it. Tonight it was going Cheltenham's way. The third was nicely taken by Richards and the fourth by Marshall was my goal of the match. How often have we seen players fluff it when there is only the keeper to beat? Not this time. Richards could have made the fifth his own but luckily a defender did some of the work for him.

5-1! Do unto others as you have frequently let them do unto you (for a change). My throat hurts.


CHELTENHAM TOWN: S Brown; K Haynes, A Gallinagh, D Diallo, J Low; B Marshall (M Watkins 90), J Labadie, D Bird, T Lewis; B Hayles, J Richards. Subs not used: M Pook, D Hutton, E Hammond, J Perry, J Quaynor, J Alsop.

REFEREE: R East.

ATTENDANCE: 2,331 (115 from Barnet).